Moving from the Parking Lot to the Party

Last weekend I had the privilege of celebrating a dear friend's 50th birthday. Y'all, this lady is not afraid to show up and dance. And dance she did. The joy radiating from her face all night was priceless. Instead of getting up and dancing, I sat and watched, too afraid of not knowing what to do, and looking foolish. And because of that, I missed out.

Me, Dianne- The Birthday Girl, and Yolanda

With no recollection of when I realized I was a terrible dancer, all I know is that I was always that girl watching from the wall and wishing I was out on the dance floor. I am that girl that says I hate to dance but deep down inside I desperately want to let loose, feel the music, and move. I want to be that girl that walks doesn't leave until the last song is played. But then something happens. My upper body does not connect to my lower body and it is as if they belong to two separate people. It is nothing short of a tragedy (yes, I realize I am being dramatic). Terrified to just show up and dance, I always sat (and still sit) on the sidelines, envious of those that can move and those that just get out there for the heck of it, without a care in the world.

Jesus seemed to say that all we would need to do is scrape together the pieces of our lives that had fallen on the ground, bring those pieces to Him, and He would start using them. Jesus didn't say that He would ice over the grit of faults and failures either; He said He would use us in spite of the grits and faults and failures. What we would have to do is decide to move from the 

parking lot to the party.

Love Does, by Bob Goff

Moving from the parking lot to the party, showing up and being seen, in life is often scary. Depending on the situation, we can feel paralyzed on the sidelines even when we truly want to join in. For me, the fear of failing and not being good enough can easily win and keep me from experiencing the fullness of life. What's funny (and extremely frustrating all at the same time) is that the very standards of what I imagine as success and being good enough are standards that I have placed on myself and rarely come from anyone else. While I encourage others to take a chance and jump into the game, I am my own worst enemy and can talk myself out of engaging in life and taking a risk in a heartbeat.

But God doesn't want my perfection. He doesn't want me to wait until I have cleaned up all the broken pieces and dirt in my life. He wants to use me (and each one of us) in the very place He has us in this moment. And for that I am incredibly relieved and grateful. I don't want to sit on the outside and simply watch. I want to live my life to the fullest, experiencing all that God has for me. I want to seek Him in obedience even when it is scary and requires vulnerability (because most of the time it does). Waiting to join in before I can reach my impossible standards means I will miss what He has for me... opportunities to show love to others, to learn from those around me, and to grow my faith.

What about you, sweet friend? What holds you back from getting out there? Fears of failure? Past hurt and rejection? Impossible standards? Shame? What keeps you from moving from the sidelines to the playing field? Whatever that is, my prayer is that we would release those fears, dare to be brave, and move from the parking lot to the party. Next time, I'm dancing.